Team 2021
Nonviolent Requests Guide
A four-part script — observation, feelings, needs, request — for raising a hard conversation without it landing as blame.
What it is
Four stacked panels, worked in fixed order: state the observation as fact with no evaluation, name the feeling it produced, identify the underlying need behind that feeling, then draft one specific, doable request that would meet it. Built directly on Marshall Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication framework, packaged by Strategyzer as individual prep for a single difficult conversation.
Reach for it when
- Feedback needs to be given to a teammate and there's a real risk it lands as an accusation.
- A conflict keeps circling because the actual need behind the complaint was never named.
- A request keeps coming out as a vague demand instead of something the other person can act on.
Running it
- Write the observation: what happened, with no evaluative language.
- Name the feeling the observation produced.
- Identify the underlying need connected to that feeling.
- Draft a specific, doable request that would meet the need, then deliver the four parts in order.
Watch out: A judgment disguised as an 'observation' ('you were careless' instead of 'the report was a day late') undoes the whole exercise — as does skipping straight to the request without naming the need, which makes it land as a demand.
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Recent Comments (3)
This workshop was incredibly effective for our remote team! We adapted it slightly for a virtual setting and it worked wonderfully. The key was breaking into smaller breakout rooms.
Great resource! One tip: prepare all materials the day before to avoid any last-minute rushes.
Used this for our quarterly planning session. The structured approach really helped us stay on track!